In case you missed it

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BETTING ON TROUBLE 

Boxer Floyd Mayweather reportedly made $178 million on Saturday night, when he defeated Manny Pacquiao in Las Vegas. Mayweather made more in two hours of boxing on Saturday than any athlete has ever made in an entire year.

To put Mayweather’s earnings in context, he made $3 million less on Saturday than the GDP of Kiribati, an island nation that once had vast reserves of sweet, sweet phosphate but ran out in 1979 and now only sells coconuts. Mayweather made enough money on Saturday to buy each Kiribatian a Taco Bell cheesy gordita crunch every day for the rest of their lives — which would be a little over two years, according to unconfirmed, independent research on gordita tolerance in mammals.

The fight’s mass appeal was that Mayweather and Pacquiao are the world’s two best fighters. Mayweather has beaten everyone he’s ever faced in the ring. The problem is that he’s also beaten a few people outside the ring, too. Mayweather has been convicted on four separate domestic violence and battery charges since 2000, including multiple assaults on women. Also, sports journalists Rachel Nichols and Michelle Beadle said the Mayweather camp denied them press credentials to the fight after they each asked “tough questions” about Mayweather’s history of abuse.

But “Money,” or “TBE (The Best Ever)” as only Mayweather himself and the cast of Entourage call him, wasn’t the only one to capitalize on the masses. Ticket prices ranged from $3,500 to $250,000 (that’s a lot of phosphate) and Pay-Per-View tickets on HBO and Showtime cost about $100 each. Bar owners were charged about $30 per person to air the fight. And since boxing has no regulatory agency, all this spending went unchecked and filtered into a few deep pockets — none more so than Mayweather’s — and what we can only assume is a company that makes shiny, high-waisted shorts. To no one’s surprise, Mayweather says he’ll gladly fight Pacquiao again.

BLAME IT ON THE DRUGS 

For decades, people in Florida have been running through the streets, claiming they’re being chased by dogs, making love with trees, impaling themselves on fences and saying they are the Norse god Thor, but now they can blame it on drugs.

The Ft. Lauderdale police department issued a report recently that a new cheap synthetic drug is causing some of its residents to do all those classic Florida bloopers listed above and then some. Called flakka, gravel, $5 insanity or, our suggestion, Sunny D Florida Style, the drug is made overseas and has similar effects to bath salts.

This stuff is nuts, and let’s hope people stop using it. We love Florida’s wacky, innocent foibles, but introducing these crazy pills is like when you’re hanging out playing Uno with your siblings on vacation and your cousin Jimmy comes into the loft with a sixpack of Bud Light Lime. No, Jimmy! No! It’s family game night and my mom says you’re a bad influence.

WEIRD COW BORN IN FLORIDA 

Annabel, a cow with two heads, was born in Florida this week. Farmer Dwight Crews realized the cow was two-faced, he says, when they were having a totally normal conversation and then Becca and Abby came over to their locker and Annabel “totally acted like she didn’t even know me.”