NAZIS FUELED BY METH, NOT HATRED
It’s no secret that Adolf Hitler was on a lot of drugs — the Führer was famously addicted to cocaine, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg. His personal physician, Theodor Morrell, injected Hilter with huge doses of amphetamines, barbiturates, hormones and opiates right after breakfast every day for five years.
No scheiße. A new book, released on Sept. 10 by German author Norman Ohler, proves that the Vorsitzender of the Nazi party made sure his military forces were equally high on a pill form of crystal meth called Pervitin.
In case you haven’t watched Breaking Bad, meth is pretty bad for you in the long term. Despite the initial flood of serotonin and dopamine making users feel like golden gods for a bit, sustained use of meth will lead to mental deficiencies, aggressive behavior and psychosis (not to mention loss of teeth and skin wounds that won’t heal).
For his new novel, Der Totale Raush (The Total Rush), Ohler spent years searching German and U.S. records to collect details on Nazi drug use during the genocide that led to the death of six million Jews.
It turns out that Hitler had millions of Pervitin pills sent to the front lines and distributed to the Nazis before invasions, particularly Blitzkreigs, including the invasions of Sudentenland, Poland and France.
The pill enabled the troops to stay awake for days and hike for dozens of miles — and, in what comes as a surprise to no one, the Nazi troops were horribly addicted to it. Ohler found letters from a Nazi in 1939 asking his family for more Pervitin: “It’s tough out here … Today I’m writing you mainly to ask for some Pervitin.”
We’re still pretty sure the Nazis were fueled by hatred, but meth probably didn’t help.
TELL ’EM HOW YOU REALLY FEEL
Assholes can rejoice because Facebook has listened to its users who wish they could show disdain with only a click of a mouse. Lord of Facebook, Mark Zuckerberg, announced to billions of his disciples that a “dislike” button will be addded to the online social media platform.
Now, hold your horses. It’s not an actual “dislike” button. Zuckerberg gave a vague answer at the press conference saying it’s more a button for sympathy, to show solidarity in times of strife. So there would be another option, instead of “liking” that post about a natural disaster or personal tragedy.
Finally, people will be able to express empathy to their Facebook friends, because up until now there was no other way to reach out to friends going through tough times. Now, when a friend suffers through a death in the family or loses their job, you’ll be able to show your compassion with the littlest effort possible. Thank you for this gift, Mark.
And surely, there’s no chance of misuse of this new button. It will only make Facebook a more accepting and loving place. Instead of saying you “dislike” a picture of your friend’s new baby, soon you can tell them you feel bad that their baby is ugly. When Donald Trump posts an insensitive and hateful message, you can show empathy for his stupidity.
No word yet on any other button approvals such as “Meh,” “Get a Life,” “No One Cares” or the much-needed “I’m only clicking this button as a distraction from going out into the real world.”
