Let’s adopt the GOP’s national platform

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Courtesy of Jim Hightower

Well, I didn’t expect this!       

The National Republican Party has published an official policy document showing that the GOP really might be more than a gaggle of serve-the-rich plutocrats and wacky, Trumped-up right-wingers. Just when you thought the party was consuming itself in the know-nothingism of its presidential pretenders and the recalcitrant do-nothingism of its congress critters, out comes a sign of sanity.       

In this 18-page manifesto, the party proclaims that, “Our government was created by the people for all the people, and it must serve no less a purpose.” ALL the people! Forget pontifications by Wall Street billionaires dividing America into virtuous “creators” (like themselves) and worthless “moochers” (like you and me) — this document abounds with commitments to the common good.

“America does not prosper,” it proudly proclaims on page three, “unless all Americans prosper.” Wow — that’s downright democratic!

And how’s this for a complete turnaround: “Labor is the United States. The men and women, who with their minds, their hearts and hands, create the wealth that is shared in this country — they are America.” Holy Koch brothers, share the wealth?        

Yes, and how about this: “The protection of the right of workers to organize into unions and to bargain collectively is the firm and permanent policy of the [Republican Party].” Eat your heart out, Scott Walker, and you other labor-bashing GOP governors!

The document also supports our public postal service, the United Nations, equal rights for women, expanding our national parks, “vigorous enforcement of anti-trust laws” and raising the minimum wage. New enlightenment in the Grand Old Party. Hallelujah!

Can all this be true? Yes — except it’s not new. This document is the Republican Party Platform of 1956.

This opinion column does not necessarily reflect the views of Boulder Weekly.

  • ernie_oertle

    WORKING TITLE: I LIED, I LOVE MONEY! Noted Anti-Capitalist Man-of-thePeople BS Inks Book Deal.

    Get. Out. Of. Here! Next thing you’ll be telling me is that rabid environmentalists live in giant mansions & love jet-setting around the world in private planes to collect their fair share of the global-warming Fraud.

  • ernie_oertle

    Wed-evening, 20Jul016, commentator LauraIngraham spoke at theRepubConvention. She described both Brexit & theRepublican platform as a move toward national independence & away from control through international bodies, attempts to reverse a two-decade-long trend. Yes by all means Jim, let’s adopt theReublican platform!

  • The few remaining reasonable Republicans must be pained to be reminded of their once-honorable past and how far they’ve moved to the extreme right since then.