Let’s adopt the GOP’s national platform

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Courtesy of Jim Hightower

Well, I didn’t expect this!

The National Republican Party has published an official policy document showing that the GOP really might be more than a gaggle of serve-the-rich plutocrats and wacky, Trumped-up right-wingers. Just when you thought the party was consuming itself in the know-nothingism of its presidential pretenders and the recalcitrant do-nothingism of its congress critters, out comes a sign of sanity.

In this 18-page manifesto, the party proclaims that, “Our government was created by the people for all the people, and it must serve no less a purpose.” ALL the people! Forget pontifications by Wall Street billionaires dividing America into virtuous “creators” (like themselves) and worthless “moochers” (like you and me); this document abounds with commitments to the common good. “America does not prosper,” it proudly proclaims on page three, “unless all Americans prosper.” Wow, that’s downright democratic!

And how’s this for a complete turnaround: “Labor is the United States. The men and women, who with their minds, their hearts and hands, create the wealth that is shared in this country; they are America.” Holy Koch brothers, share the wealth?

Yes, and how about this: “The protection of the right of workers to organize into unions and to bargain collectively is the firm and permanent policy of the [Republican Party].” Eat your heart out, Scott Walker, and you other labor-bashing GOP governors!

The document also supports our public postal service, the United Nations, equal rights for women, expanding our national parks, “vigorous enforcement of anti-trust laws,” and raising the minimum wage. New enlightenment in the Grand Old Party. Hallelujah!
Can all this be true? Yes; except it’s not new. This document is the Republican Party Platform — of 1956.

This opinion column does not necessarily reflect the views of Boulder Weekly.