If I Could Fight

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Dear diary,
I felt something new today
after weeks on end
of nothing but fatigue;
it was hatred
for the human race

It’s getting worse again
after coming so close
don’t shine that light here
it’s grown used to the dark

No one knows
in the clear still water;
a reflection

No one sees
on the shimmering horizon;
a mirage

For those I love
I would shatter the earth
and snuff out the stars
but that is not something
I am capable of
doing

So instead I will
hold on by
the whites of my knuckles
until my fingers break
counting my breaths
facing the world
head on

If I could fight I would fight
but the enemy is inside the gates
so instead I’ll smile for you
through this desolation
for hopes of a better future
because you deserve to see it

Patrick McGuire is a writer of poetry living in Estes Park. More poetry can be found on Instagram @pattycakkkes777.