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A printed conviction

Medical marijuana dispensaries have faced a tough series of regulations during the past year, and some are struggling to keep up with the new fees levied by cashstrapped state and local governments.

A Nov. 6 piece in the Daily Camera titled “Boulder medical marijuana shops struggle with laws” detailed some local businesses that are grappling, in various degrees, to pull together the cash necessary to bring their shops up to code. But we’re sure they didn’t appreciate this subtle jab, as written by reporter Erica Meltzer:

“Industry observers say many mom-and-pop operators have sold out to new investors with backgrounds in business and access to capital. Those who haven’t filed for new licenses may melt back into the black market from which they came.”

Now what could this mean? Dispensary owners who can’t afford the new license fees were all black-market drug dealers prior to Amendment 20? That if dispensary owners can’t apply for licenses, they will resort to selling their wares on street corners and dark alleys? Black markets are illegal. We bet some dispensary owners might object to the implication that they will operate illegally if regulations become too onerous.

It’s journalism 101: Don’t let your language convict or implicate people in a crime; that’s the job of police, judges and juries. Come on, Camera; you’re better than this.

Alien crème and space bros

We get lots of press releases about upcoming events, but this one is simply out of this world.

Here’s how it begins: “UFOs, and the people in them, are engaged on a spiritual mission to ease humanity’s lot. The World Teacher, now living among us, works tirelessly with the Space Brothers in a fraternal enterprise to restore sanity to this Earth. Our Space Brothers are responsible not only for crop circles but also for preparing the way on Earth for a new technology of light which will give us unlimited power from the sun.”

Intriguing, eh? But wait, there’s more. They go on to pose a few questions that have been burning in all of us, especially the one about crème: “Who is Maitreya? What is a World Teacher? Who is Benjamin Creme? What is the technology of light? Let us answer your questions and draw your own conclusions.”

So apparently there are actually presentations planned on this stuff. They are at 7 p.m. on Nov. 17 at the Longmont Public Library, at 2:30 p.m. on Nov. 20 in the Boulder Public Library’s Boulder Creek Meeting Room, and at 7 p.m. on Dec. 8 in Broomfield’s Mamie Doud Eisenhower Library, Room B.

Brought to you by something called Share International Mountain West ( ).

Knock yourself out. But don’t forget your light saber and your Kool-Aid.

Goddamn hippies

Speaking of, did you hear about the man who was kicked out of a church near St. Louis last week for dressing like Jesus?

According to media reports, Neal Thompson has been dressing up like Jesus and going to a different church each week to spread the good word. But when he showed up at St. Paul’s Lutheran Church in Des Peres, Mo., he was not just turned away, but they called the cops on him.

Kind of makes you glad we’re just stuck with Seth Brigham, doesn’t it? Thompson don’t talk too good neither, unlike Jesus. He was quoted by Fox affiliate KTVI describing this exchange with a deacon:

“And I said, ‘Well this ain’t right, you guys ain’t treating me right.’ He said, ‘We’re gonna call the police.’ I said, ‘Well call them, I don’t care. Call them.’ So I sat down and the next thing I know four or five police showed up.”

And then there is the kicker: “Oh I forgive them, I forgive them,” Thompson said of the unwelcoming church-goers.