It’s a beautiful time of year. The days are getting longer, I can get stoned in a sundress, and Mother’s Day is upon us. Considering all the time you spend not calling your mom back, this day serves as an important reminder that you would not be here if it weren’t for the woman who quite literally brought you into this world. I mean where else would you have developed that deeply ingrained sense of entitlement that only comes from your mom telling you how special you are every day of your childhood?
In the spirit of the holiday, I’d like to express my gratitude that I am not a mom (thanks, Plan B!) and also give a shout-out to the women who are. After all, growing, birthing and raising decent humans is really hard and pretty much everyone takes that unpaid emotional labor for granted. Based on what I’ve seen on social media in the past few years, I think we all need to chill out on the harsh judgments we throw at moms.
Now, I’m not a mom, so if you disagree with anything I’m about to say and find yourself thinking, “She has no idea what it’s like to raise children!!” well, you can calm down because I completely agree with you on that part. My only credentials are that I’m 28, the age when all my Facebook friends stopped posting photos of succulents and latte art and started posting bump selfies and gender reveal announcements.
Ever since the people around me started getting pregnant on purpose, I’ve been constantly exposed to “wine mom” memes and comment threads filled with women like “sounds like our house lol!” If you didn’t know, moms are boozy. Apparently they always have been, but millennial moms are taking it to the next level by wrapping up their low-key alcohol addictions into a Pinterest-perfect aesthetic. And honestly, that’s chill if it’s what you’re into. As long as your kids are safe and your life isn’t spiraling out of control, being a mom is tough and if you need a glass or three of chardonnay to take the edge off, you do you.
As a society, we totally accept that alcohol is an inherent part of mommy culture, but do we feel the same way about moms who use marijuana? Today, moms are smoking weed like never before to deal with everything from anxiety and postpartum depression to the daily stresses of child-rearing. As the industry expands and more states legalize it, the “stoner mom” market has the potential to disrupt the industry. Some companies have already been inspired to introduce mom-friendly cannabis products.
Unfortunately, the stigma around marijuana still stands, especially when you combine it with the unfair standards and pressure we already place on moms, making it hard for anyone to talk openly about the benefits. That’s a shame because we also don’t talk about how stay-at-home moms experience higher rates of depression, which alcohol increases because of the way it interacts with certain neurotransmitters. So the mommy wine everyone jokes about is actually making moms feel worse, not better. Cannabis doesn’t have that effect and can improve symptoms of depression. Instead of ostracizing moms or threatening to take their kids away for smoking pot, we should be offering them edibles and vape pens, not just wine glasses and pill bottles.
Sorry, wine moms, but you had your moment. We should embrace the new era of weed moms. I’m not suggesting that groups of moms should drive around with a fat blunt, hotboxing their minivans while the kids are at lacrosse practice (although if that is a thing, please let me join your group. Maintaining a vast social life as an adult is hard and I’d almost consider having a kid if it means more friends), but we should definitely chill when it comes to how we judge the way some women choose to deal with stress.
So don’t forget to call your mom and send her the right kinds of flowers. After all, Mother’s Day is the day to congratulate her on her life’s greatest achievement: you. My mom passed away when I was 14, so remember, if you don’t treat her nicely, just know that I will be there to get her stoned and take her to brunch and listen to all the drama in her book club and win her over and she won’t even love you the same anymore.