MITT’S WORLD OF PLENTY
In an age in which cash-strapped Americans have been shedding their SUVs and short-selling their massive suburban homes to downsize to smaller, often urban-infill dwellings, Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney once again shows how in touch he is with the public by declaring that “everyone should live like this” while at a $1,000-per-person dinner party at a mansion. We’re not talking a Highlands Ranch McMansion. We’re talking private golf course and swimming pool mansion.
Why, yes, of course, Mitt. All 313 million Americans should definitely live in dwellings of more than 40,000 square feet on 16-acre estates (the figures for the Kentucky estate belonging to Papa John’s pizza-chain founder John Schnatter, whose home Romney was in when he made the comment).
That’s about 736,000 square feet per person. At that rate, we could house about 37 people per square mile, and accommodate the population of America only if making use of the entire square mileage of the North American continent, leaving some poor sucker with a golf course in Saskatchewan — and all 34 million people who live in Canada floating on icebergs in the Arctic. But hey, who knows, perhaps it’s all part of a brilliant scheme to make the most of global warming, which could turn scenic Nunavut, with its average daily temperature of 46 F in July, into the next Hamptons.
YES, IT’S STILL CALLED THE ‘DAILY’
That item in the May 9 Camera about their kid sister paper, the Colorado Daily, going to a three-times-a-week schedule in the summer sure was a fun read.
The move is being done not for reasons of profit, or lack thereof, but “in honor of the season.” Yeah, right. And then there’s this one: “For readers, the new schedule means more time to pore over each edition.” Ha! That only takes about 30 seconds, considering that what’s not wire filler is already in the Camera!
Finally, we’re told: “For advertisers, it means 7 days of exposure for 3 days of advertising at our Crazy Days of Summer rates.”
Hey, by that logic, we’ve got a better offer! We’ll give you seven days of exposure for only one day of advertising!
Not sure whether this is a news story or an advertisement, because it quickly devolves into addressing the reader as “you” and fluffy appeals to advertise in the currently editor-less Daily. It’s sad, actually, considering what the Daily once was.
IT’S NOT EASY BEING GREEN
American Tradition Partnership, the right-wing group that funds dirty campaign tactics like the push poll against a liberal Longmont City Council member in the 2009 election season, is patting itself on the back again for its anti-environment gains.
This time, ATP Executive Director Donny Ferguson sent out a press release congratulating himself on helping to defeat SB 178, the state legislation that he says would have increased Colorado’s renewable energy mandates.
Wouldn’t want to get more of our energy from renewable sources, nope. Not when you’re a special interest group that specializes in protecting the rights of oil and gas companies to rape and pillage the earth.
Donny, whose group, don’t forget, was represented by none other than our Secretary of State Scott Gessler, claims in his self-serving screed that the bill would have increased our utility rates by 25 percent and that green energy installations actually cause more pollution than using coal or natural gas.
Keep sniffing the fumes, Donny.
Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com
